The Feelings of a Dead Heart
by xTheCrazyDancingPersonx
Summary: Nothing's fine, I'm torn, I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel, I'm cold and I am shamed...


**a/n: To be honest, this pairing isn't my favorite or anything of the sort, but I find it quite interesting, and I never really play with these characters in full-length fictions, just tiny little Pointless prompts. Nor have I ever put them together in the same chapter, so this is something new to me, hope you all enjoy. Inspiration go to Lea Michele's wonderful cover of "Torn", which fits the couple perfectly, imo.**

* * *

She felt cold. No surprise. Being dead, it was a regular thing. But to be swept up in her lover's arms, a certain warmth would spread throughout her... and last she knew, her lover was by her side. However, it seemed that was no longer a true event. Was it a dream? Was that it? Spectra wanted that feeling of warm fur against her again; the light purrs would be a lullaby, but then again... this was the norm. She should've remembered that. The fact that Toralei never stayed the night, not if she was sober. The only few times that the two would get a moment alone, just to share an embrace, would be after some wild party. Then, it wasn't worth it, because the werecat would play a sickening act of denial.

The sunlight seeped through the blinds and Spectra was lying lifelessly in her bed, the thin sheet covering her body. What she wouldn't give to have her precious little kitten lying by her side peacefully, and for once, not be frightened to know the fact that they loved one another. That was why the whole reason they were together, anyway... if you could call what they had a relationship. The only times they'd ever see one another was at school, and in public, Toralei would refuse to acknowledge the ghostly gossiper. With no one around, however, they were rough, and mostly lust-crazed.

That didn't seem like love. Or a true relationship. It seemed like friends with benefits, minus the friendship part. They hated each other, or used to, and the three words had never been said, nor have the mentioning of really liking one another.

Spectra wished that she could change, but no one can do that so quickly. She sometimes thought that if she changed, then Toralei would as well, and then the two of them could finally have a loving relationship, or at least something of the sort. That was all she wanted. She had died in mistaking her feelings love-wise, and now that she could live forever, she wanted to make sure not to play with her heart anymore. But someone like the cunning werecat was doing exactly that. Like a toddler with a rattle, Toralei just loved to mess with the feelings of her so-called girlfriend.

_~0.0.0~_

_"Kiss me."_

_A brief pause happened between the two, before Spectra blinked slowly and shook her head. "Why should I?" she whispered, staring deep into her lover's emerald eyes._

_"Why shouldn't you?" Toralei snapped back, with a light hiss. "Don't you care for me?" Care. Never love. That was noticed, not often, but still. It seemed so hard for the werecat to say that one simple word._

_The ghostly being floated down to the ground, becoming face to face with the ghoul she claimed to have feelings for. She wasn't sure what to think at moments like this. "You never kiss me." she replied, her sky blue eyes shining._

_"That's your reason?" the werecat muttered, rolling her eyes sarcastically, backing away. "Sometimes I wonder why I put up with you, Vondergeist."_

_'That makes two of us.' Spectra wanted to bitterly state, but she bit her tongue. That wasn't like her, in addition to the fact that she knew not to flip out around Toralei. Being by her side took a price, one that Spectra was willing to pay, but only if it meant that things were worth it in the end. Sadly, she could never determine that._

_"Fine." the gossiper murmured, leaning in and capturing her lover's lips into her own. This kiss was like all of the ones that they had shared; mysterious and wondering on Spectra's side, lustful and wild on Toralei's. Two completely different aspects to their embrace, and surprisingly, their emotions were always blind to each other._

_~0.0.0~_

"You didn't think I'd leave you, did you?"

Spectra let out a light gasp, as her gaze quickly switched to the direction of the voice, her bedroom doorway, and there standing, with a stupid grin on her face, was Toralei. "You're still here?"

"Your parents still aren't home, so yeah." the werecat muttered, carelessly walking into the room with her usual cockiness practically radiating off of her. Spectra knew that her lover was still drunk. How sad, her hopes had briefly lifted for nothing whatsoever.

She should tell that skank of a werecat to go, leave, get out and never come back. The gossiper may have been a sneak, a liar and other things that were perhaps just as worse, but to use one for their own personal gain, especially for false feelings, it was a horrible thing. However, due to Toralei having no shame at all, it didn't matter. Nothing ever did.

"Good thing you're awake." the werecat hissed, falling onto the bed next to Spectra, letting out a light purr as she outstretched to trace the silky skin of her fake lover. "Nice that you can became solid for a bit."

"You would never say that if you were sober." the ghostly creature murmured. "You barely even talk to me then." Her lips lightly brushed the ones of Toralei. "I love it, moments like this, when you're here, but there's nothing, and even when you're intoxicated, you know that."

They say once words are out, you might regret them, but you can't take them back, because they're already out there, into the world and they can't be unsaid. Well, right now, in this moment, only the slightest pang of regret coursed throughout Spectra's feelings once her statement had been declared. It was the truth that she had been holding back for the longest time, and like they also say, the truth hurts.

"Maybe the reason I get drunk is because I can't say these things when I'm normal." Toralei stuttered out, her gaze falling downcast, to the white sheets she and her lover laid upon. "You ever think of that?"

An awkward moment of silence passed as Spectra hesitated, tracing her fingers through the werecat's bangs. "It's crossed my mind." she admitted. "But you've left me alone too many times, how can I believe it?"

A single tear trickled down Toralei's cheek and she managed a weak nod, as if she could understand, despite the reality of her mind being fogged; unable to comprehend anything at all. No matter what her condition, she did feel different, in a good way, around the ghostly girl, but her ego would get in the way and then everything would be ruined.

"I love you, though."

Spectra's expression wanted enlighten, but the truth was something else. "I know that you're a great liar, Toralei."

...

If her heart was still beating, it'd be torn in two.


End file.
